*Gets knocked off bike by taxi in traffic lights queue*
Cabbie: What do you think you’re fucking doing?
Me: OW. OW. OW. My leg.
Cabbie: Don’t you fucking look?
Me: Well, yes. But there’s a stationary bus three feet in front of you. There’s literally nowhere for you to go. *points at bus*
Cabbie: [unable to deny this fact]
Me: Did you just try to run me over?
Cabbie: Fuck off.